hilarity ensues

ME: I couldn't make a coconut cream pie to save my life.
RON: Have you ever been in that situation?
I had to think about that for about .5 nanoseconds
ME: No, thank G'd or I'd be dead.

This is typical banter at work when the stars are not aligned for the dark forces of pre or post menstruation. It is nice to have things back to normal after the wierdness that was last week.

technophobe to engineering, come in LaForge

1.14.2009
I can see myself becoming addicted to being at home again if I keep this up. As I write, I am warming my toes after an arduous trek through the impassable driveway with 50 pounds of storage gear. The sun is out (ironic isn't it?) chickadees are twittering in the giant blue spruce while I am tucked into bed to stave off illness. My writing desk holds a box of Cheez-its, my mango peach fuse and a host of material I am supposed to be transcribing. I can also fit a remote caddy in the lapdesk. The remotes opperate the radio and the ceramic heater. It holds the cell phone as well. And at this vantage (broadcasting14.25 inches high above the bustling metropolis of dustbunnydom) I can see outside and know when the mailman, the plow guy and the men in white coats are coming. I'm freezing and I can't feel my heels, but I have the world at my fingertips.
Flippant as I am, I have to say that I am thankful to have somewhere to live even though it is so far from perfect as to need to be condemned. And while I am not satisfied to have to be scrambling to pay my bills and constantly on the brink of total ruin, I have to find moments of pure happiness. A few moments given ones self in bliss restores the vital energy required to look another bleak day in the face. Anyone who would deny his or her fellow human being any gift of restorative power should be ashamed of themselves.

Third and final installment

12 19 08 part threeTonight Verta got to the core of what we are learning. Light cannot be served when your being is focused on selfish things. Duh? Ya would think so. But Verta hit on hte word selflessness. Selfless means that you take your self out of the picture. Your self is your ego, your expectations of you, others and your path. When you think "This isn't how my life was supposed to be" you are focused on your expectations and yourself. The self you remove fom the big picture is your conscious awareness of your strengths and weaknesses, your rights and responsibilities, in other words- the stuff of Earth. That would be 3rd dimensional bullshit for you folks keeping score at home. When you take your personality and ego out of the equation then you become an empty vessel ready to receive the light, to serve the light much like a pitcher serves milk or wine. This is what the Jewish mystics teach. It is a spoke of the Buddhist wheel of life and probably what Christ's teachings about healing meant. For you Christians keeping score, this isn't a salvation issue. This is a What do you do with what you've been given issue. An empty vessel is dark by definition. And an empty vessel is an unused vessel collecting dust on its shoulders while it sits on the shelf. Sure you can fill it with crap. But beyond eventually becoming fertilizer, what good is crap? If you are living in dank, dark, dense 3 dimensional, impure and imperfect humanity then you are the dark stinky crap in the jar. Take the crap out and there is room for light. Pour the light onto something else and there is more room inthe jar for more light. I know... dark too. I might tackle that later. For right now it is important to say that if you fill up your jar with Jesus, fill it up with love, fill it up with light (Sting reference) you don't have to worry about the no-thing-ness encouraging Satan to take off his shoes and sit a spell.Selflessness lets us take risks like my friend [name redacted]. It allows us to encourage others because it is for others and not us. Sometimes encouragement is rejected. It flies in the face of logic to reject good uplifting encouragement. But dammit Jim we're humans, not Vulcans. Selflessness allows us to be instruments of peace and healing. it allows forgiveness becasue you ego isn't in the way keeping score.Selflessness allowed Jesus, Yeshua, to let go and let G'd, rathere His Glory and Mercy which is often depicted as rays of light to heal. all those that come to the Father do so through me the physical christ or thorugh my example? Will any translation of the bible make the distinction? i don't know. But I will dare make the distinction myslef, and do so on the side of "Do as I Do not as they say I said." for one simple reason: the way he did htings serves the light. Selflessness celebrates the light. The light is the Mercy of Heaven, Grace of G'd, and the breath of the Holy Spirit. The act of forgiveness is possible when you take your self out of the issue. It isn't truly possible on a purely human level because our humanity requires us to reckon accounts payable and receiveable. All that does is keep focus on things as permanent as sopa bubbles. The eternal soul is our focus. The eternal soul is hte spark of light within us that seeks other lights, celebrates their source and returns to the flame htat begets them.That is out business: seeking the light in our fellow man, linking arms and hearts and celebrating the light, the source for which is our journey.Lables are human things that seperate flame from flame and diminish us as a society. Light is light. G'd is G'd. It isn't frivolous. It isn't a waste. But it isn't a purpose that the darkness approves of. Those who would serve darkness will try to absorb us and distract us with all manner of calamity and reproaches, fruitless and unobtainable goals.Darkness is a cold, jealous place where laughter and love dies. I am not afraid of the dark... just tired of fighting it alone. So I am doing my business-celebrating the season of Light Dispelling Darkness, frivolously celebrating those with whom I ma connected and using my gifts according to the call, serving the light be learning to heal as Yeshua promised we would do.Now that I have fulfilled this portion of my commission, I will reset my alarm and sleep a bit before work, posting at first opportunity.