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Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Lots I should do but doing all the things I shouldn't do

I love blogging. I know my house mate doesn't quite get it. There was a fairly long streak of sunshine today so I took advantage of the light and dashed off a few shots for future posts. It took a bit of time. I lost some light to setting up and digging through boxes. But I did get some good shots. And I am looking forward to using them to illustrate some posts.... hmmm... I said that.

I know this is a weird geeky thing that I do. I also know that I will probably never write for National Geographic, Omni, Martha Stewart Living or any other magazine that I wanted to write for when I was in high school. And as I am kinda regressing to that high school mentality that I had I think there is a good psychological reason for what I am doing. I just don't care to parse the meanings right now. I just want to create. I want to write. I want to write a magazine. Welcome to blogging!

And part of having a magazine is having the glorious pictures to go with it. Somerset Studio is also responsible for my drive to make a pretty blog thanks to its artful blogging magazine. And its part of the process to be alone. By alone I mean in the company of cats who don't give a fig what I am doing as long as I am quiet, don't move them and feed or pet on demand. One of the reasons artists create alone is that it is easier to focus. The other reason is so that they don't have to explain themselves....

as I had to when she came home unexpectedly.
... and caught me doing things that were not on the agenda, because this is still an issue



Caught in the act of setting a photo shoot like I'm a friggin pro with a pay check is kinda embarrassing. And I had to explain myself. And the reasoning. I tried to deflect with a potato casserole but that didn't work. Ugh! She is going to find out how weird I am. And with any luck that weirdness won't mean having to move. It's not like I destroyed the house....

It's just more of the pointless stuff that she doesn't get.
More of the pointless stuff that few people get.... unless they are the kind of people who like the things that I like. Or, family who might like to remember through an online scrapbook of sorts. After all... isn't this really what it will turn into in the long run?

My nieces and nephews are going to wonder who the hell their Aunt Sherry was. I don't see them enough for them to know me in person. So all that there will be is the blogging. And even that won't be 100% representational.

I should be doing a lot of things besides taking photos for the blogs. But I had good light. Gotta grab it when you can. And I am a bit distracted by two issues and can't really focus my brain on the must do list. The only one I feel I can talk about is money. It's going to be a long Winter. This whole kidney thing just sucks. And the struggle to figure out what I want to be when I grow up is not making the money easier. The other thing I can not talk about is tomorrows lunch.

I have a date. And I don't want to obsess about what to where. Who the boy is and how to make a great impression. I'm impressed as hell with him already. But I don't want to think about it. I don't want to think about all the things that have gone wrong in the past. I don't want to think about the past in terms of boys that coulda, mighta and didn't. I don't want to think about the shouldn't in the past. And so I am avoiding the basement. The past is down there. Gramma & Grampa past I can handle. But the past relationships have random tokens tucked into each box. And I am just not willing to sabotage a first date by thinking about other dates.

So here I am... frittering the day away with things that I should not be doing.

Oh God where do the days off go?


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