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Friday, May 16, 2008

delay, detour or the destiny of the damned?

For good or bad, I have taken a "real job". I am housekeeping. It is good honest work. But so is what I was planning for myself. The difference is that the people I had thought I wanted in my life didn't see it that way. So for a long time I put my art on a shelf. And now I feel like I am on a quantum tangent that leads away from my goals. I have looked at my studio and can not even open the paint tubes.
Of course the pain in my hands from all the scrubbing I've done in the last eight days could explain a lot of that. But I am so tired and sore that I don't want to do anything. My mind rails against the stagnation but my body complies with its lethargy.
The quote on today's board about the greed of gain destroying beauty in life and nature to turn all things into money seeps through my bones like poison.
Any one have a mirror device to put me back into the right universe? I think I slipped the veil a while back. I want to go home.

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