The Great Internal Debate

I am thinking about a new blog. I won't ditch any of the other ones. But I am thinking that a new era of my life deserves it's own unique electronic foot print. Facebook is very public and great fun for making snarky comments. And I love that the art and writing are connected to my facebook page in such a way as to make sharing with enquiring minds possible. But this is all fun and games. I am embarking on an adventure. It is mostly an internal struggle. Close people in my life have been in on the introduction and the start of the opening act. But it is a melancholy drama and I don't think that some of them can hack the stark reality of the play.

And I liken it to a play because, as Uncle Willy says (not Uncle Wil, the other Uncle Willy), the play is the thing and all the world is a stage. Each of us is a player upon it, either on the stage as the principles or support in the wings waiting for our entrance into each scene. And sometimes we have to fill in at the back of the house, stage moms, set painters, props department, directors, choreographers and music coordinators. We all have parts to play at each moment of our lives. And I think in this role of mine, as I am an ingenue to the production, it is too much for the support cast to handle.

In real world speak, it feels a lot like I go this road alone even though I do have friends and family. It is just that there are some burdens that those close to you are not meant to bear. Nor are they always capable. And as I have seen in my life and in a friend of mine, you have to absorb the energy to preform from the audience and not the other players. The other players get the words wrong on occasion. And this will happen during a play even after hundreds of performances. Only the fanatic who has seen every performance has the luxury of speaking with the actors and delivering flawless dialog. Strangers are detached from our predicaments enough that their own feelings don't get in the way of their attempts to be helpful.

So I am thinking about building a blog to deal with my observations and frustrations on a very tender subject.