Smaller worlds

I am uncertain what all if this Internet business will lead to in the grand scheme of things for humanity. In the past two weeks I have: connected with people that time and my distracted self have forgotten, lurked around places where people I want to reconnect with are, worried myself over things long passed where those people are concerned, made new friends (you remember ACG) and am learning about music and the universe from a new friend I have made on line. I have also, in due course, been ignored and dissed by others I evidently found more interesting than they found me. I have also had a strange face to face encounter which I regaled you all with yesterday. In short, while my own personal universe is expanding and I am planning to weed some smaller galaxies from my cosmic garden, I find that I desire expansion in ways that i had never wanted before.
Today I cried at a blog I follow. I know the blogger personally, granted from a long time ago, and I know more for him than for Wil what the loss of his pet was for him. I find that I miss some people more strongly now than I ever have before. One of the things I realize is that while I have spent time wishing things were different, others have gone on with their lives.
One of the things that can be said for the internet is that it can bring us places we have never been, bring people we love and miss closer to us. But, in sharp contrast, I also see how the distances increase. For some of the people I have strongly loved in my life cannot be connected to me any more easily through the Internet than through a traditionally sent Christmas card. Time and tide have moved beyond my isolated shore.
In some respects, I am more acutely aware of how lonely my life is today than have been in a very long time. Upon reflection, I ask myself "What have I been doing for these last 13 years?" The answer is startlingly brief... nothing. Pining. Waiting.
So what am I doing now? I am looking for keys to the past while simultaneously looking for the key to the future. There is something truly Biblical in that imagery. If I keep to this road I shall never be an artist of any repute, an author of any renown... I shall be a lump of salt from all the stupidly useless tears I've shed over things I can not change. And there will be a vast Internet audience to see it happen as it happens.
Again, I don't know what this Internet age will do for humanity. Perhaps it will only make it easier to be the schmucks we have been pretending not to be.
On that note: hug your friends, forgive them their shortcomings and don't lose touch.