I am a great fan. If you hook me, I am hooked forever. And sometimes it doesn't take much to win me over. I know I fell in love with Trek in only 5 minutes and it has been a life long love. I fell in love with Sherilyn Kenyon's characters because of the way she writes with the first joke that almost got away. And Castle? He won me with the first smirk. In real life, I'm just as easy. I love Brad because he laughs at all my stuff, even the stupid stuff that no one should laugh at. I love the fact that Ron's wit challenges my recall. Sam, Dan, Danie, Brooke, Shana, Dylan... did not take long to form friendships with them at all. I don't even mind so much that the pheromones coursing through work have brought back my periods on a more than less regular basis. Stupid biology. Jack thinks I'm 23 so he shoots to the head of the line. In fact, I look forward to seeing everyone I work with. How often can you really say that? So, it really should not surprise me that I can form a rapid and firm attachment to someone I've met on line.
Yet, I wonder... how is it possible that after only 3 or 4 e-mails that I am now so disappointed that my Knight in Shining Armour seems to have fallen from his high horse (I never put people on pedestals)? He wrote me 3 e-mails because 12 hours passed and he had not heard from me. Its been better than 25 since I sent him my last response. Nothing.
More to the point, as we all know how much I do enjoy my time and most of my independence, why the bloody hell do I want to cry over it? It isn't like there is TONS of substance in his e-mails. They are long, he hasn't professed his undying love and he isn't talking about hitting the sack the first time we meet like that goofball in MA. Obviously still in the process of learning about each other, this seems to soon to have said something that wrong.
Trust me, I'm as socially awkward when it comes to stuff like this as a 12 year old; I can say a lot wrong... rapidly. Yet... I always get along with Virgos, he is an artist and I have great credentials for dealing with his 7 year old daughter. Of course... there is the possibility that he isn't real. I've discussed this with ACG. I can't find any Internet info that matches what he's told me. He doesn't describe with a lot of detail and he writes with a pronounced accent. he may be one of those lurkers trying to suck cash or the life out of someone.
I admit, I didn't get that impression at first. But I went back to the website where we met and I can access his account again. For the last two days when I click on his picture it has told me that his account was no longer active. Most importantly... why do I want to cry about it?
Did I really get sucked in that fast? And how, even with my fan abilities did it happen? These situations are so delicate that I am always more guarded with my emotional involvement. It doesn't cost a lot of emotional currency to be someone/thing's fan so I do understand how I can fall for a character/show/writer's style so easily... and hard. But how did "Pterowood" get me that fast?
I just don't know how it is possible.