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Thursday, May 20, 2010

in which I am reminded I don't have a penis

There are people where I work who make my job easy, people who make my job difficult and an handful that don't care if I am there or not. One of the people who makes my job difficult is our bean counter.. you know, because that's what they do. No one likes bean counters other than the people who see the profits from them doing an efficient job. I get that. It's a universal thing and as old as at least the New Testament. But the latest thing just makes no sense.

We have a partnership with a corporate entity who said we needed to have someone who's job was to keep the publicly viewed and used areas clean. That is all they do during their shift. Bean counter decided that it was unnecessary. While I don't know that exact words that ran through his head when he was struck from behind with this epiphany, I imagine it went something like this: "Sherry doesn't have enough to do if she has time to be behind the bar making coffee for guests and popping off about things that she has noticed."

I have a history with this guy. Every time I need something ordered for my department he makes the maintenance guy do an inventory to verify the need. It seems as though every time I open up my mouth about something that he decides someone with a penis needs to make sure I know what I am talking about. It happens so regularly that the last time Maintenance went to count linens he finally asked "Why do I have to do this?"
"Because I don't have a penis."
"You're crazy."
"Do you have a better explanation?"
He walked away. I know he didn't believe me. So now we've condensed two jobs into one. We in laundry now have to spend part of the day cleaning public areas. It wouldn't have been a huge problem except that he reduced the number of hours we can work to get all of this done. During the week it is slow enough that this crazy idea is passable. On weekends we have problems. I can't get into the pool area to clean it before it is full of people and it is never not full of people. The other problem is that the sales department books events for 8 am, wants the public areas clean before the even starts and the first person in comes in at 8am. I know what you're thinking. It was the same thing I was thinking, "How much for just the time dilation device?"

So I said to the GM, maybe someone should come in at least an hour before events start. And maybe come in early on weekends. My super suggested the same thing. "We'll give that some thought." Really? How would you like to be the first guest on the scene, hit the bathroom and see that some ignoramus already bombed the hell out of the bathroom when the bar closed? So my super mentioned it in a meeting a week later. No reaction. Nothing. I mentioned it to the GM again. Nothing again. Then the maintenance guy said something about the early events. "Well, you could mention having someone come in early."
"What good would that do?"
"They might listen to you."
"Yeah? What makes you think so?"
"You have a penis."
So nothing happens. And nothing happens. Then this week the Sales manager, in the managers meeting, says to the GM, "You know, we should just go ahead and have someone come in early on the weekends. Especially before these early event." The ideas was seconded by her assist. The GM says to my super, Yeah we soooo should do that. "Do you think Sherry will come in early this weekend?"
Um what? Didn't I say that I would, could and SHOULD no less than 5 weeks ago???? I need hours since I can't live on 27.5 hours. But that was never the point. The point was that our business was starting to look like crap and we were not dealing the customers a good hand. I would have come in an hour early and gone home an hour early if the hours were too big a deal to them. But it looks like that isn't an issue. The issue is that I have neither penis nor status to ensure that my suggestions are heard. Oh wait! I lied. If I make more work for myself to do then I can be heard. Like not meaning to volunteer myself to clean carpets this weekend because I am tired of everyone telling me how we are falling short of our goals. Oh yea! I get to run the carpet cleaner.

Mr. Spock, odds that I can find someone with a penis to do that for me?

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