Downtown

I worked a night shift last night and it took until 4 am for meto finally settle down for a good nights sleep. I set the alarm for 7:30 because I had anticipated a glorious announcement of unparralleled joy. I reset the alarm for 9am but never went back to sleep. I couldn't. I just kept thinking that I would have answers and that the freedom I have been waiting to experience would be there today. So... I slapped on some soap and water, got dressed in the comfiest of clothes that I could find and called the shuttle. It would be an hour before I could get a ride.

Coool. Tuned into swr4 in Baden-Wurtemberg for a little Monday morning schlager fix, got a recipe for a red currant streudel and chilled. My bag was packed and ready for the confirmation. And in one hour as promised, I was on my way to the attorney.

It wasn't long before I was able to sign the paperwork. I reminded the attorney that we had discussed the specifics of getting money and getting him paid. He suggested that I hoof the signed paperwork down to the other attorney's office, ask the paralegal about payment arrangements and we would be good to go. So I got to the other office, left a note and my phone number and was told to wait about a half an hour. So I stepepd next door to enjoy the rest of my mocha frappe and settle my nerves.

Exactly the moment promised I got the call. The other attorney told me that I could not get answers from him. "Well my guy told me to ask you guys how you were going to proceed with the check so that I could pay him. That check is going to him for services."

"But that is nearly the whole amount o..."

"Yes."

"Well I'll shoot him and email and make sure I have his permission to talk to you. We lawyers have rules we have to follow that sometimes make it seem like we are brushing you off. I just want you to know that I am not."

Here is where I was a very well behaved girl. In part because I do not have the voice to yell what I was thinking. And in part because I vowed to do all the yelling when the Probate judge closed this case. What I wanted to say to him was: "Yes, lawyers have rules like fact checking a client better than the National Enquirer!!!!!!" But what I said was, "Well, I'm still downtown."

And I stayed downtown until it was too cold to continue to wait around since I had to walk home in near gale force winds. And I waited.

Wrote 22 pages in my journal. Watched the meterman give someone a ticket to have them return to the car withing 15 minutes. Owch! Dog sat 2 German Shepards while the owner stepped into the bookstore for coffee. Read 106 pages of the Swan Thieves (Awesome!!!!) Ate a Havarti Dill sandwhich, browsed some art books, watched two sets of women paly mahjong, eaves dropped on a conversation about 50 Shades of Grey, and scanned the stationery aisle for some inspirarion. And by the time the winds picked up and I had to start heading home I was pretty sure that I was not going to get a phone call. And.....

I didn't.

Seething. It was one of the longest walks home that I have had to make this Summer. I have many thoughts on why this is taking so long even though the executor admits that it could have been wrapped up two weeks after I called my attorney. But to be honest. This could have been wrapped up within a few weeks of selling my dad's house if the executor hadn't taken it all to pay for his life to avoid being homeless. Did I mention that I am and have been this whole time? Oops....

Seething. And not interested in protecting my dysfunctional family any more. I have about two weeks before things get really uncomfortable. If you're thinking that homelessness is pretty uncomfortable, you are right. But homelessness and totally dependent upon others on top of it is worse. I can almost get myself dug out of the thick part of the quagmire I'm in. But I need this to be settled. If it does not then I drown.

So now I am looking around for more options, hoping that they somehow magically grew new species of options in the Garden of Make Believe since the last time I went looking for help.